Fake Smiles

A week of alone time has much to offer me, especially in self realization, self understanding and self development. I never know respond to things alone gave me more space to breath and rest. It's never been an incident or an event that lead me to my path now, rather than its always a tolerations of strings of events. When it hits the red bar, it just need a tiny spark to set it exploding.

Anyway, it had been happening for quite some time, that i felt friendship lost its integrity of love and understanding, too much fake smiles and talk just to be careful of what the consequences might be. One talk to me about friendship, that I do not care and understand her situation. "I never took time to understand you?" first thing came to my mind. I felt people are taking for granted of what they have and owned when things are happening at ease to what they wanted. As again, people are disposable. No one cant move on without the existence of one person.

Truthfully, I felt free that I no longer need to take care, lead, or keep a list of what everyone needs and wants. I don't know how I sound to everyone right now, may it be selfish, or childish, or loosing faith in mankind, it doesn't matter to me. I may hate or dislike friends right now, but i know sooner or later, that heart of mine will regain its passion and trust to do what I do best, making people stick together. For now, that heart is sobbing in a dark corner, saddened by the case that people are not being real and true to themselves, or in another lost of love, and covered by self-centerness for benefits.

I hope we can all put down that mask and really start thinking, really deeply that what we do, is it for the great of people, or is it purely the benefit of ourself. When we say we cross the line, what set the distance or the line, money? Everyone wants to save more money for themselves, why not think of a better and fair way, rather than pushing the unseen cost to be bare by another one.

I end this, with the hopes of the days we would no longer need the existence of fake smiles around.