Keeping Silence

Whenever I'm quiet, there's a lot of speculation out there. People would think I'm mad for no reason, "emo" or things which are relevantly negative in a way.

Whenever I'm quite, I'm thinking a lot in my mind, somehow I just dive into my thoughts, and left my skin running on autopilot mode.Whatever I do at that moment, it's not going through my mind, but rather I'm wondering in my own thoughts. "My head is often like a shopping mall, filled with memories and thoughts of different brands and quality, there's also dreams and reality. So, I shop when I have bad moods." I was marking my friends work in class earlier today, I was looking on a different image and marking on a different image, and I didn't even realize till my friend told me, "how come you are marking the same one with me?" I was shocked on how out of focus I was. It's dangerous, imagine I was am chopping food, i might only realize my fingers were gone when someone told me. [haha]

The matter in fact, yes, I'm thinking a lot today. It's never been anyone's fault, but me to accept "THIS IS HOW LIFE WORKS." I never learn to accept it, always had hope for the world to be a better place. I want to build trust in our world, and not to be so defensive and thinks whatever comes ahead might be a threat.

"I'm nice to you, and I hope you do too." 

Surprise

I think the thing I'm looking forward the most this year, is a surprise. Surprise which totally blow my mind, surprise that will make me speechless, a big surprise. Well, of course, this post is not meant to pressure friends whom are reading my blog to do anything for me, but I just wanna share about this little thing in my thoughts. [haha]

I organized quite a few surprise event for some friends, usually for birthday events. And some are special case, personal, and probably not a good idea for me to mentioned here. I always had this urge to do something different, especially a surprise event. The one which i remember clearly is when I was celebrating birthday for 2 close friends at a time. One male and another female, me and a few friends transform my house living room into a romantic candle light atmosphere. And we even dressed formal to serve both of them. We tricked them to our house, saying that my dad's company dinner has empty slot and invited all of us to go and formal attire. They came nicely dressed and were surprise when they saw my living room. We prepare meals for them and prepare music and stuff like that. It was indeed a memorable ones.

Well, that were the one I remembered clearly of my surprise event that I organized. The most surprising event that happened on me is done by another friend. It's meant for me, during my birthday, I totally didn't see it coming. And when I get back, a huge group of my close friends were already sitting on the dining table waiting for my arrival. I was so nervous, about how I should react. I wasn't prepared for any of that. It was really nice. Love it and living till now to remember it.[haha]

So, if were given a wish. I wish for a surprise. 

First Attempt @ Smoke Photography

Crap Talk

Always love those days filled with activities. Morning, as planned, we [me, yipin, weijia] headed to KLCC for a exhibition, though we are not too sure what's the exhibition is all about [thanks to ms ice cream]. On the way, we dropped by lowyat to get some gadgets. Just got my portable external Seagate harddisc, it actually came with a 5 years warranty. I just thought its worth the price.
Then, headed to KLCC, cant enter, due to the exhibition requires a more formal dressing, and we actually went in shorts[=.="]. [Dang!] All the way from Sunway and can't enter. Anyway, the rest of the day were pretty much interesting to me, but describing it here would some how be boring to read about.






Listen to this: Crap Talk - Episode 1 @ Spanish Chinese

The Malaysian Books

I had always wanted to do something for Malaysia. When ideas hit your mind, there's just so many things I wanted to do. Anyway, I have this concept of using a book to travel around the world, rather than a Malaysian to travel around the world.
Often younger generations nowadays always had bad thoughts about Malaysia. You may ask them to tell you what's good about Malaysia, it might take them some time. Try asking them the bad things about Malaysia, they may just easily list out a hundred to you. Complaints may start from bad public transportation till ugly school uniforms. Instead, overseas country to them is always better. Thus, I want to share with Malaysians all around the world, that Malaysia may not be the perfect country, but it takes us all to make it the perfect place for us and the generations to come. To me, once a Malaysian, always a Malaysian. Despite all the bad critics about Malaysia, I still say I am proud to be a Malaysian, I stayed loyal and do my responsibility to make Malaysia a better place.
I still think we need not depend on our government or any party to promise us any improvement of the country, but rather depend on ourselves on how can we help to improve the life of Malaysians. My idea of this book is to let Malaysians all around the world to voice what they felt, and what they think so that we learn to accept and stop pin-pointing, and let's hold hands to make this the perfect place for all of us. 

I did not know what thought me to be patriotic, even though we were being thought in primary school and secondary school during our moral subject. But I'm pretty sure those patriotic spirit don't come from those books. Probably it was caused by my parents, they don't always agree on a similar point when they read about political issues in the newspaper or on the television. One would agree and another would go against, each stating out their own interpretations of the situation. It actually helps me to look things from many point of view, rather than just plainly look from the bad side of it and start criticizing things about Malaysia. I wouldn't say I'm the perfect Malaysian, and I did not dislike and cursed Malaysia before, there are times where things just got up my nerves. However, one thing I am sure of that I love Malaysia.

---> The Malaysian Books will be releasing soon, with a more detailed elaboration on how it works and how do be part of it. Stay tuned for it, it's something we can all start with to make Malaysia a better place with some little effort.

The Mood to Blog

I think [...] I shifted my computer out of my room last week, cause I really couldn't stand facing the 4 sided blank white wall inside my room. I just felt really uncomfortable.  As I was writing this post, it is raining cats and dogs outside now. The feeling just felt really good, probably most of the time, I was hidden inside my room, and hardly hear the sound of the raindrop when its rains. Eventhough some might say that they have no privacy doing things in the living hall, since everyone is walking around and able to see what you are doing. I just felt that peace and freedom out of it, what made it better was the rain.

I can hardly describe my feelings now, but it was all plain good and peace. I just felt like blogging about it. [>.<]

You know what's hard?

Went out the last friday, with few of my friends [yipin, wailun, kok wai, dorcas], headed to the Youth Festival 2010 held in PWTC. It was so well publicized by the organizer, and it was supposed to be the largest youth festival ever held in Malaysia. And so yea, I worked out my day plan and we went. I decided not to drive, since I have been hungering for photoshoot with my old 350D for quite some time. We embarked on our journey using KTM headed to PWTC and along the way what i wanted to do most, shoot.

Life's has been pretty easy for me for the past few weeks. I ate a lot, I met a lot of people and I did a lot of things, most of my time are pretty packed up. It felt good to have all my energy flowing throughout my body and get things done. Just one of the memories I refused to remember is I sang for a singing competition. [haha] It's a long long story, but yeah, it's rather an funny and embarrassing experience. Well, [yea] as I said, life was really easy for me, going around KL area with KTM was rather fun and relaxing for me. I don't really have to think and pay attention on the road all the time. For once, I could actually stare at the droplets of water on the window of the train with a completely blank mind.

We spent two hours at the youth festival, it was not a very well planned event I would say. Disappointment hits me. The only thing would really compensate would be that I managed to see Dato Siti Nurhaliza up close live in person. That's basically all that I would write about the event. Then, we headed to Brickfields to participate in the Wesak Day celebration in one of the famous temple.  All in all, tiring yet enjoyable day for me.

Completing assignments, and connecting with friends, apparently not the issue which bothers me the most, it somehow came automatically to me. Though yes, I had to admit, there's still many unsolved friendship issues. It's not something fixable, but to wait things to get its flow and start anew. What's hard now is... Nothing.